Easy to Give, But Damn Hard to Receive

Written by Dana Childs

Dana has been described as “non-definable” due to her immense gifts. Her work has been sought out and praised by actress and Goop founder, Gwyneth Paltrow, as well as a host of famed actresses, Grammy award winners, dancers, and talk show hosts. LEARN MORE
Who doesn’t love to give? It’s so easy! And fun! In fact, it comes far more natural to most of us than receiving. Typically, receiving isn’t always an innate trait. We must develop our capacity to receive.

Why is it important to know how to receive? Because we can hurt others, not to mention deprive ourselves, if we don’t know how to accept and allow!

Think about this. Let’s assume that you found and purchased the perfect gift for your best friend. You knew she was going to love it. You are beyond thrilled to give her this gift. Delighted with yourself, you wrap it with loving care, and head over to her house. You can’t contain your grin as she opens the door. With pride and excitement oozing out of you, you say, “I found the perfect gift for you. I can’t wait to see your face when you open this box!”

Imagine that your friend says, “I don’t want that gift,” and without even looking at it, closes the door in your face.

How would you feel?

Chances are you’d feel hurt, sad, and rejected. Receiving is powerful as it allows others to open and expand their hearts. It allows more love to circulate. Receiving is a way we not only take care of ourselves but also take care of those who wish to give to us.

Let’s break it down energetically.
Our energy centers, or chakras, don’t just emanate out of the front of us; in fact, they span through and around us. The heart chakra is an interesting center because typically we give out from the front and receive in from the back. Remember the heart chakra is all about community, love, and service, giving and receiving. The love we have for others emanates from the front of us, and the love we receive, be it Divine, human, nature, or animal, comes in from the back.

Are your shoulders tight or your upper back feel stressed? Your body is sending you a signal to let more love in, to be receptive.

It’s more difficult to receive than to give.
Think about the last time someone gave you a compliment. Did you graciously smile and say “Thank you,” or did you deflect or deny the compliment?

What we know now is that it feels better for them and you if you are open and receptive.

Are you ready to learn to be more receptive and thus expand your own heart center?

Here are 3 simple ways to do just that:

1. Stretch the place between your shoulder blades – remember the old exercise of squeezing your shoulder blades together while chanting “We must, we must, we must increase our bust?” Do that! Perhaps it’s an added bonus if you increase your bust, but the real goal is to loosen up the space in the back of the heart and stimulate the receptive part of the heart chakra. Let the love flow in! For even more oomph, imagine a Divine stream of light flowing in through your back body. Allow the light of Source love to infiltrate your every cell.

2. When people give you compliments or gratitude, practice simply responding with “Thank you,” and letting the compliment land in your body. Breathe it in. Stop denying or deflecting it.

3. Start looking for the love coming your way so that you’re more ready to accept it. If your child makes you breakfast in bed, accept the breakfast, but tap into the love coming your way. If your partner folds the clothes when the dryer stops, take a minute to feel the love he or she felt for you as they were performing this chore. When the cashier at the grocery smiles at you, make eye contact, absorb the sentiment, and smile back. Receive what’s given to you on every level – the physical as well as the emotional.

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